Just Wondering 3

My wife says women have escaped foot-binding and corsets only to wear shoes that look like medieval torture devices and clothes that are so tight they can’t move. That’s progress.

She also says people are always looking for someone who can think outside the box. She’s still trying to find someone who can think inside the box.

Ever notice how in commercials and sitcoms 99 percent of the men are dolts and 99 percent of the women are brilliant?

Who else is tired of Jim Carrey movies?

I’d say Jim Carrey is a foul-mouthed version of Robin Williams, but I’ve heard Robin Williams in concert.

Show me a comedian who depends on a potty mouth to get a laugh and I’ll show you a comic who isn’t funny.

So the newspaper editor who dropped Michelle Malkin’s conservative column called her an “Asian Ann Coulter”? I guess that makes him a Caucasian “Dumb and Dumberer.”

Remember when it was easy to turn stuff on and off? We had things called switches. Now we have computers that lock up and must be rebooted, stereos that need a remote, and televisions that have to communicate with the VCR and DVD player. Even the lights have dimmers.

Guthrie’s law of complexity: Things will become more and more complex until they don’t work at all.

Back when I was a kid, I thought the 21st century would be a lot like “The Jetsons,” with people flying around using jetpacks. Chicago’s perpetual road construction seems more like something out of the 19th century.

My wife remembers when teens used to spend hours talking on the phone. Now they send text messages.

Cell phones and pagers used to be for real estate agents and doctors. Now fifth-graders have them.

Do kids really need cell phones? What are they talking about?

I don’t want to be reachable 24/7, and I don’t need unlimited anytime minutes.

When I think about how utterly clueless I was before I got married, it’s frightening. What did she see in me?

Signposts on the way to maturity: high school diploma; college degree; paying rent; working for a living; getting married; graduate degree; buying a home; cleaning the bathrooms without being asked; having children; accepting yourself; helping others; worrying about your parents; keeping your kids intact through high school.

Parents who obsess about their children getting into the right preschool need to chill out.

Kids usually don’t break.

For the most part, kid videos are the last refuge of the untalented and unimaginative.

When kids lose their cool, don’t lose yours.

Being a parent means always having to say you’re sorry.

Who says theology is impractical? The doctrine of original sin has been empirically verified every day of human existence.

Pain and pleasure are brothers who travel together.

If “thou shalt not covet” is the Tenth Commandment, why do we Christians always “covet your prayers”?

Speaking of Christian clichés, will someone please take that poor frog out of the kettle?

About Stan Guthrie

Stan Guthrie is an editor at large for Christianity Today magazine and for the Chuck Colson Center for Christian Worldview. His latest book is God's Story in 66 Verses. He also is author of All that Jesus Asks: How His Questions Can Teach and Transform Us, Missions in the Third Millennium: 21 Key Trends for the 21st Century, and A Concise Guide to Bible Prophecy. He is co-author of The Sacrament of Evangelism. Besides authoring, writing, and editing books, Stan is a literary agent, bringing together good authors, good books, and good publishers. Stan writes the monthly Priorities colum for BreakPoint.org. He has appeared on National Public Radio's €œTell Me More,€ WGN's Milt Rosenberg program, and many Christian shows, including The Eric Metaxas Show and Moody Radio'€™s €œNew Day Florida.€ A licensed minister and an inspirational speaker, he served as moderator for the Christian Book Expo panel discussion, Does the God of Christianity Exist, and What Difference Does It Make?
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